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Why do I bother?

So I logged onto the Comcast technical support chat to try one last hope- they never tried sending a signal to our cable box, so I decided to give it a shot and see if that might do anything. Negatory on that one.

After they sent a signal, I decided to ask if there was anything that could be done to discourage/prevent people from cutting the lines, since I had been told that the issue was that the lines were cut as if someone was trying to splice in and steal our service.

So the response that I get was "We are going to send out a technician tomorrow and it is already noted on your account that you are having an ongoing problem with the cable service."

and then "The technician will be the one who is going to decide if they are going to cut the line physically or they can do something else."

Um...why would the technician cut the line? I figured I'd phrased the question badly so I tried again, rephrasing the question a bit and preceding with "The last technician told me that the problem was that someone had cut the line, can that be prevented?"(Though I thought that "Is there any way to protect the wires from being cut by someone trying to steal service?" was pretty straight-forward)

So her response was "I already talked to my supervisor and he said that we are just going to take note of your request so that the technician is aware that you want to prevent us from cutting off the lines."

*headdesk* It's not the fucking technician that I'm worried about. *sigh*

I gave up at that point and said that I would just talk to the tech tomorrow.
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Dear World,

Die, ISDN, die!
*stab stab stab*

Yours truly,

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"I Just Trnd On My Computer and It Just Wontend My To Re Lond It A gean And I Just Reand Stold It 2 Days A Go .It Dont Exspir Taol The 9-3-2008. And It haes Bean Workeng Un Teal now"

Thanks gawds he added the error code or I never would have been able to do anything with it.

How do these people get computers????


May. 8th, 2008 06:31 am
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So customer writes in with an error in his security software.

We know about this error and there is a new version of the program to correct the issue. We advise him of this and provide the link to the download, instructing him to completely remove the offending version and then install the new version.

His response?

"But if I just uninstall the old one, won't I be unprotected from viruses?"

*sigh* Yes, you caught us. The new version doesn't include an antivirus. That's how we're fixing the error.
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Arright people, listen up. I got some advice for you, should you ever choose to email technical support:

Emailing tech support twenty times and saying only "it doesn't work" is not going to get you very far.

Getting pissed off and demanding a refund when we ask you for specific information about the problem is grounds for a bitch-slapping.

It doesn't take a rocket scientist to copy down "error code 7" or to inform us that the program tells you your license expired early.
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Customer quote: "I can't get my unit up. Er, I mean I can't get turned on. Um, nevermind. It's just dead."
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A Thought

Mar. 28th, 2006 06:53 pm
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Someone once told me that I shouldn't get so annoyed with people who can't comprehend simple things like "count ten seconds" or "press the power button" becuase they may be able to do all sorts of things that I can't, like they might be an ER doctor who saves lives all day or something.

That's all well and good to remember. But if they're having problems with "count out ten seconds"....I'm not so sure I'd want to entrust them with my life.
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"I'm a tech-savvy nerd friend. The computer is very angry right now."
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"I'm transferring the internet onto my computer."

"I hate to perseverate but..."

"4- uh, let me start over...4- uh that's not right...4- yeah that's it."

Fuego: "Have you called before?" Idiot: "Well, I travel back and forth between here and Chicago a lot so..."

"There is not enough volume for this destination you settled" (Supposedly reading straight from an error message onscreen)

People say this stuff to me.

While I'm here...anyone got some insight as to why I ask specifically for a first name and people feel the need to give and spell out Bob, b-o-b Smith, S-m-i-t-h? But they always stop after Bob, like they've answered my question appropriately, but as soon as I start with "Okay, and may I have your phone number?", right at about the word "may", they need to spell it, and then they do so REALLY rapidly and without breathing continue onto "Smith" and it's spelling? And get all huffy like I've interrrupted them. At one point, I started putting a bit of empasis on the word "first", which has reduced this a little bit. Oh, and when women catch themselves doing this, they ALWAYS finish, giggle maniacally and say "You said first. My first name is Cindy"

One day last week, I had a guy completely blow his stack because I asked for his first name but not last. (I usually don't NEED the last name.

Or feel the need to spit out 5 phone numbers at the same time "my number is 555-1212 but if that doesn't work try 555-1213 or 556-1234 or 555-4321" And then if I ask them to hold on a second because takes a minute to search for a single number...they get all huffy.

Endlessly annoying as this is (Far more information that I've asked for...I ask for information a I need it. Plus it interrupts my train of thought.), my point is NOT (entirely) to bitch.

Seriously. Is this people being impatient with me? Is this some sort of social conditioning...these are not random occasional things, it's a no-fewer-than-75-80%-of-my-calls thing.

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Swiped and paraphrased from a post on [ profile] techsupport

I don't CARE if you're "not-technical". I don't give a flying rat's ass if you are "computer illiterate". I don't expect you to know how to backup your registry, or scan for spyware, or even how to set up outlook to connect to your email. But you do need to know how to use the basic user interface for the computer.

You don't need to know how to rebuild an engine to drive your car. But you DO need to know how to turn the wheel and push on the pedals, even if you're not "mechanical"!

This is SO reasonable.

If you've had your computer for literaly 3 years and can't do basic things like....I donno, REBOOT..what else can that really be besides willful ignorance? Kindergarteners learn this stuff in a few days. Seriously. At this point, you don't have the right to say "I'm still new to this." You don't need to be an expert. You dont need to know how to do all the "complicated" stuff that I'm gonna tell you how to do- if you can manage to follow a few simple instructions broken down to monosyllable. But yeah, you sure as hell need to know a few basics. And have the short-term memory to remember how to reboot again 3 minutes later when you've failed to follow my instructions correctly the first time.

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Consultant (noun): One complete moron hired by another complete moron to call up tech support on their behalf.
syn. 'My IT Guy", "My Guru", "My Administrator", "My Friend Who Knows Computers"

Note: may also be an 8-year-old child. If this is the case, the odds are good that s/he has a clue.
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-Stoopid people should not be allowed to own computers.

-Stoopid people should REALLY not be allowed to own computers with any kind of wireless anythign in place

-If I tell you to update your software if's not because I enjoy saying "I want you to update your software" I don't care if it worked 5 minutes before you called, do you want my help or not?

-Unless the email account in question is a .Mac email account, I CANNOT tell you what your email settings are supposed to be. I don't know. I don't work for your ISP. I don't know who your ISP is either unless you tell me.

-While we're at it....Mac is NOT an ISP, it is a bunch of internet-related services and software.

-Yes you have to have some kinda of service at your disposal to connect to the internet. Buying an iBook and an AirPort isn't gonna magically pull the internet outta the Aether.

-I really don't know exactly what firware is or what it does, I just know that resetting it magically fixes a lot of problems. So shut up and type.

-"Reboot" is the same as "restart" No, I do not want you to put your computer to sleep. If I say "shut down, I do not mean "restart"

-If you spend $500 on the iTunes music store and don't back it up, you deserve to lose it all if your computer crashes.

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Scary-happy chick calls up at work today....just got a brand new 15" powerbook. 10.3 installed, updated to 10.3.2. Discovered that she can't slap 10.2 on it to dual boot.

Happy chick- So she calls me up "Hi, I was hoping you could help me uninstall the firmware for 10.3.2 from my Powerbook. I need to be able to run 10.2 and the firmware is for 10.3, and the firmware changes the hardware."

Me- "Uh...that's an...interneting question. I'm going to have to check on that."
Me- to Debby, who shares my cube and desk space, and is cranky as hell today "No doubt this is beyond scope of support...WAY't...uninstall firmware, can you?"

Debby- "Uh, I don't really think so"

Me to Happy Chick- "Uh yeah, I'm gonna have to say that I've never even heard of uninstalling the firmware and even if it's possible, I can't really help you with it."

Happy chick- "Oh there has to be someone there who can help me! I need it for my software. I'm confident that there's someone in your place who knows. Who's the guru, can I talk to them? I know you have someone there! I have confidence in Apple!"

Me- "Yeah, uh sure, I can let you talk to someone else. Just a minute..."
In my mind "They're gonna tell you the same thing I just told you"

Tier 2- "She wants to what? Yeah, that's not really something that you can do. Wants to talk to someone else? Yeah, sure. This could be amusing."

Uninstall firmware? Umkay...

Don't even get me started on the dude who insisted that Safari was an ISP and if AOL wasn't working, he should still be able to just open Safari and surf.


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July 2013



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